Humans are very social creatures by nature; we crave and search for fellowship. This is the core reason why some of us just can’t stand to be “alone”. We go on a bunch of dates and prance through a string of failed relationships just to find that special someone, but singleness, I would argue, is a crucial part of your life that prepares you for that special someone you are looking for.
Oftentimes, relational issues aren’t really relational issues, but singleness problems. If we aren’t prepared for a relationship physically, mentally, emotionally, and financially things can go bad really fast. When we are single, we can work on being the best person we can be; we can focus on being the best in our career or focusing on/building our careers, we can focus on doing some inner work and bettering ourselves emotionally and mentally, we can manage our money and get our finances in order, etc. When relationships come at an inconvenient time in our lives, it can feel like there is a rock on our path; there is almost no time for that special person because you’re so focused on yourself or you abandon yourself and make your life all about that person which is never good or healthy.
When we are single we have more time to spend with our friends and family. We can get to know/learn about ourselves and our interests when we are alone long enough. When we are single we can have our own things under our name; we can have our own house, our own car, our own bank accounts, etc. This will give us a sense of security when the right person comes along. If this person is the wrong person by any chance we can live with the comfort of knowing that we have our own life and things in order, we have our own security and stability to fall back on.
The more stable and mature we are, the more prepared we are for a relationship. Self-love is also very important which is why I say we must do “inner work”; if you love yourself, you can extend that love to others, if you don’t you won’t have any love within yourself to give. If you feel insecure about yourself, chances are you’ll make your partner feel insecure about themselves as well. As the saying goes: “it is better to be alone than to be unhappy with someone”; this saying is true because when you tie your life to the wrong person you welcome pain, frustration, and an array of other negative emotions as well as outcomes. You aren’t burdened with a partner like this when you’re single. You are free emotionally, physically, and mentally from a bad partner.
When we are the best version of ourselves we will naturally want someone who is our equal. We are going to want someone just as successful as us. Math was never my specialty, but if two amazing people get together that makes for an even better relationship and thus a better family if you look to start one someday.
