We all love to see power couples like the Obamas and the Carters(Bey & Jay) on our televisions. Seeing these couples’ public display of affection has made it cool to be in relationships. However, this trend is one that millennials can’t seem to get with. After a few cocktails and frivolous conversation with friends about celebrity marriages, one particular topic brought me to an epiphany. Courting in relationships is old news.
Is meeting parents and bringing flowers just because it’s Tuesday a thing of the past? Yes, I’m a millennial, but I’m pretty old fashioned when it comes to companionship. Personally, courtship and chivalry are two things that shouldn’t evolve with the world. To deny that it is, is to cease to exist.
Quite frankly, the flawed perspectives of love equating to ‘Netflix and chill’ has contributed to my lackluster attitude for a sustaining relationship today. The Netflix and Chill euphemism is one that should have been buried with ‘fleek’, turnt up, and etc. The Netflix and chill era is what has perpetuated today’s rising hook up culture. Call me devil’s advocate, but I don’t see why men would court a woman if a Netflix movie date would inevitably lead to sex.
Women have made it extremely easy for men to do the bare minimum to show interest. Trust and issues of self worth are huge factors in the formula of failure in relationships. On a woman’s behalf, utter confusion as to what they want in relationships could lead to unrequited affection or just plain old desperation. Because of this, women settle for a Netflix and chill date and never mind the courting stage.
It seems as if friends with benefits are more important than having a mutual bond with a potential husband or wife. Furthermore, thoughts of ulterior motives sometimes arise when a man puts forth the effort to court. So, are women even open to receiving courtship? More importantly, is a relationship even the end goal?
It is okay for men to say, they just want sex or whatever personal desire their is. We as women, are not exempt from recreational sex as we prefer those type of relationships at times. However, courtship on account of false pretenses is certainly not what I’m campaigning for. If a man is courting a woman with the intention of anything other than a healthy relationship, they are doing it for the wrong reasons.
I will say, their are stipulations to the levels of courting. Every encounter with a person of interest does not require courting. Their is no need to emotionally invest in a relationship that is not of your interest. However, chivalry is a must.
To be clear, in no way am I passing judgement on individuals not conforming to the conventional norms in relationships. In previous puppy love relationships, I too, was guilty of thinking sporadic texts and phone calls constituted the beginning of a healthy relationship. These things matter but the courting stage establishes the foundation, and whats to be expected in the future. Women should know their worth, let men be men and court them!